Blog: Detour From Hell; The Mind of a Hot Mess

If you’re reading this, thank you — truly. I’m so grateful you’re here and willing to be part of a conversation that so many people avoid, ignore, or don’t know how to talk about. If you already know me, then you probably know at least a piece of my story. If you don’t, feel free to check out the About Me section, because my experiences are a big part of why this blog exists in the first place.

Let me say this upfront: I am not a mental health professional. I don’t have a degree in psychology or counseling. I have taken some certification courses to get my new career started. However, what I do have is lived experience — years of it. I’ve lived through mental health struggles, trauma, domestic violence, and addiction, both as a young person and as an adult. And while formal education is valuable, and I achieved in a different field, I believe there are things life teaches you that no textbook ever will. When you’ve been in the trenches yourself, your compassion doesn’t come from theory — it comes from survival. You don’t just understand people; you feel them.

I joke that I am a cat with 9 lives, and I’ve used at least 100. One of these times, I won’t be so lucky. I’ve mastered self-sabotage, worked my tail off only to burn everything down multiple times (some in my control and some out), and chose relationships that brought out the worst in me instead of the best. I was the queen of codependency — the person who took care of everyone else while completely neglecting myself. And according to both my mental health and my liver, it finally caught up with me.

But luckily, recovery changed me. It didn’t just remove toxic habits — it removed toxic people. My circle is smaller than ever, but it’s healthier than ever. I’ve learned the difference between people who are part of your journey and people who are part of your tribe. And then there are those few people that even if we haven’t talked in years, it will be like no time had passed. I’ll always care about the many people who crossed my path…… but real friendship? That is rare and hard to come by.

So why this blog? Why now?

First and foremost, it has been long overdue for a huge change in my life. I just didn’t see any way for that to happen. But the opportunity finally came and I am taking full advantage. I left corporate accounting after 15 years! I have started my own business related to the same topics this blog is about, to hopefully make a real impact. Also, many times when speaking at an event, meeting, or support group, afterward there is someone that comes up to me afterward and says, “Thank you — That helped more than you know,” “I went through the same thing.“, “I thought I was the only one.”, etc. And every time that happens, I’m reminded of a few things:

• People are desperate to feel less alone
• Our stories carry much more power than we realize
• I have much more to give to others than I realized

The truth is, I don’t think I’m special — I just think I’m willing to talk out loud about what most people feel silently. And due to my experience, I have a lot to talk about! I don’t know where the idea came from, but after thinking hard about what I wanted out of life, and after everything that has happened over the last decade, this new change just made sense!

Finally, that’s why we’re here, because despite how common mental health struggles, addiction, and domestic violence are, and the amount of stigma around them in 2025, is completely unacceptable. We’ve made progress — yes. But not nearly enough. People are still ashamed to ask for help. People are still afraid to admit what they’ve been through. People are still being punished for the things they can’t control. People are still in denial of their feelings. People still think struggling is a sign of weakness instead of a sign of being human. People think numbing is the answer. And some people think ending it is the answer. Some people don’t even realize they have been abused or has a MH disability.

So, in this first post, before we get deep into stories, resources, healing, and community — I want to start with something simple but powerful…. the truth and proof we are not alone!

📊 The facts. The numbers. The reality we can’t keep ignoring.

Because once you see the statistics, you’ll understand why change isn’t optional — it’s overdue.

Here are just a few facts on each major topic that I found astounding, and exactly why we need more advocacy and safe places for people.:

General Mental Health

• A large study done by Harvard, found that half of the world’s population will develop some type of Mental Health issue at some point in their lives
• Per the National Institute of Mental Health, n 2022, in the US, approx 60 million adults had AMI (“Any Mental Illness”) & approx 15.5 million adults had a SMI (“Serious Mental Illness), which is approx 6% of all American adults
• It is estimated that 2/3 of people with mental illness go without treatment, per Turnbridge
• According to World Health Organization: globally, about 15% of working-age adults had a mental health disorder in 2019; and working days lost due to depression/anxiety are estimated at 12 billion per year.

Domestic Violence

• WHO (World Health Organization) says that “intimate partner and sexual violence” will affect 1 in 3 women, globally
  • Less than 40% of women who experience violence seek help (in the majority of countries with available data), per UN Women – and this is definitely a topic I would like to discuss more — the myths and lies behind why they don’t seek help.
• 18.8% of current victims indicated that some form of victimization occurred at their workplace. – DOJ
• Among employed adults (men & women) in the U.S., about 1 in 5 reported being abused by an intimate partner. – Health Advocate

Stigma in the Workplace

• A survey of employees found that approximately 82% of employees have kept mental health difficulties hidden from their manager (in UK/US/Canada/Australia sample) – Corporate Advisor
• In 2025, the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) Workplace Mental Health Poll: 42% of employees worry their career would be negatively impacted if they talked about mental-health concerns at work.
• Research shows that people who perceive stigma have more work role limitations (e.g., harder to keep tasks, worse job functioning) and social limitations. E.g., one study: 27.8% of mentally ill respondents reported perceived stigma; they had higher odds of work role limitation. – The National Library of Medicine
• A survey by McKinsey & Company found that while most employers know mental-health is a problem, less than 1 in 10 employees say their workplace is free of mental-health stigma. – Lyra
• 76 % of U.S. workers reported at least one symptom of a mental health condition. Out of those people, 84 % of respondents said their workplace conditions had contributed to at least one mental-health challenge – US Department of Human & Health Services
• From the 2024 survey by Mental Health America: Three in four employees agreed that work stress affects their sleep. However, in “unhealthy workplaces” 90 % agreed, vs 44 % in “healthy workplaces”. – MHA
• From the 2024 National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) Workplace Mental Health Poll: 74% of full-time U.S. employees say it’s appropriate to discuss mental health at work; but only 58% say they feel comfortable doing so.From the same NAMI poll: 52% of employees reported feeling burned-out in the past year because of their job; 37% said they felt so overwhelmed they found it hard to do their job.

Addiction

• In 2023, approx 17% of people over the age of 12 had Substance Abuse Disorder (SAD) – SAMSHA
• Lifetime prevalence of drug use disorders (per one study) was ~10.3% for U.S. adults. – National Library of Medicine
• In a survey, it shown 23% of construction workers being under the influence of alcohol during the workday; 19% in customer service roles – SAMSHA
• Overdose deaths in the workplace due to non-medical drug use increased by 500% from 2012 to 2020 – CDC
• Synthetic opioids were involved in 3 out of 4 overdose deaths among construction workers in 2022. – CPWR

Industry Specific

• A 2020 study found that 83% of construction workers had experienced a mental health issue during their career – Trimble
• The suicide rate for workers in the Construction industry was 56 per 100,000 for males in 2021; for all sectors combined, it was 32 per 100,000 – AGC
• Synthetic opioids were involved in 3 out of 4 overdose deaths among construction workers in 2022. CPRW
• In the retail sector, 75% of employees believe that their workplace contributes to mental health problems. Also in the retail sector: 52% of employees have considered quitting because of mental health problems. iFeel
• In customer-service environments (call-centres etc), one recent article states: 74% of customer service representatives report high stress levels, and 67% are considering leaving their job within the next year. immerss

Again, there is so much more to share! Well, that is the end of my first real blog post! I hope that you find some of the facts in this as concerning as I do. We need to support people rather than hold them down. Mental Health is not going away. If anything, trauma is recurring more often than ever! We will have to learn to communicate with people who have been through these different situations instead of treating them as if they don’t deserve the same opportunities, don’t have the intelligence, or aren’t “put together” enough, etc.

I am excited to start this journey with you, share incredible information, and share personal experiences! I genuinely believe some of the facts I have come across would even surprise some of my tribe 😮 (that takes a lot), so I really hope to see you back, and thanks again for being here and for all your support. Until next time, be smart, and stay safe! Love you all!